One of the widespread problems of the modern society is divorces. Their number grows day by day, and many psychologists and scientists try to find the solution and reveal crucial aspects of relationship dynamics that make people destroy their families and lives. When couples get divorced, it influences not only them and their relationships but also feelings and emotions of their children. Still, it is only one of divorce consequences of a divorce. Hence, coping with the problem requires a detailed understanding of powers and reasons that cause interparental conflicts.
Despite the common stereotype associated a divorce with sexual infidelity of one of the spouses, this may happen for a number of other reasons. For instance, the most common pitfall that makes couples end their relationships is a lack of simple communication within their families. Without chatting, like they say, heart-to-heart, people start to estrange from each other (Perry, 2017). So, in the end, some individuals find themselves living with an absolutely unacquainted person and without any support at all, which is very difficult to endure. For this reason, couples decide to separate or get involved in some affairs. Seeing this tendency, one may claim that an individual needs to stop and think a little bit about getting engaged in serious relationships like marriage with a hard communicator. Otherwise, both spouses and their children may suffer from an inevitable divorce sometime in the future.
Speaking of children and their behavior changes during a divorce and after it, one should note that the divorce process has negative effects on almost every child who experienced the separation of parents (Knox & Schacht, 2012). This is nevertheless regarded as a norm, since showing no reaction implies more profound psychological problems of a kid. So, if a child or teenager suffers from interparental conflict, he or she may expose anger in different ways, including taking drugs and smoking intentionally to do harm to the organism and resist parents’ divorce. Besides, many people don’t even know what problems their children may face and how it will influence their adult life and self-esteem. Thus, little children aged 5-7 years old tend to think that separation of their parents is their fault, and that parents will stop loving them after the separation. This evidence shows that the major part of such kids feels abandoned and rejected.
Antisocial, aggressive behaviors may also become a manifestation of children’s reaction to a divorce. They start to change from a good boy or girl to a little monster showing their regressive behavior and expressing their anger by missing classes and rejecting to learn something new. For teenagers, this process may end with depression. According to studies of Professor Frederick Terman, effects of a divorce are long-lasting; even an adult or middle-aged person once experienced hard separating of parents bears this burden all his or her life (Divorce continues to take a psychological toll on kids, 2016). As a result, their lifespan reduces by four years.
In conclusion, one should note that behavior and mental state of a person is a very subtle thing that can be broken easily by pressure of challenging life situations. Children’s minds are flexible enough but still so brittle, and every little nuance influences the way they think and behave, not to speak of such a disaster in their family as a divorce. For this reason, parents should think about children when deciding to stop their relationships. However, it is also detrimental to continue living in a lie and keeping their ruined marriage, so if a divorce is inevitable, they need to prepare to face many troubles and support their children better.
Divorce continues to take a psychological toll on kids. (2016). The Guardian. Retrieved from https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2016/jul/31/divorce-psychological-toll-on-kids-children
Knox, D., & Schacht, C. (2012). Choices in relationships: an introduction to marriage and the family. New York, NY: Cengage Learning.
Perry, M. (2017). Major causes of divorce in this modern era. Health Guidance. Retrieved from http://www.healthguidance.org/entry/11609/1/Major-Causes-of-Divorce-in-This-Modern-Era.html
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